My 50th Birthday - putting Paris on hold

SIMPLE LIFE

My 50th Birthday – putting Paris on hold

The Birthday Bash and PARIS on hold

On the eighteenth I turned fifty, it almost seems like it didn’t happen. With all the build up and excitement about going to Paris driving me the last few months celebrating at home and then sleeping through the afternoon was a bit of a bummer. Sam and the kids made a cake, Carina set the table with pink party plates and she had the Eiffel tower made from marshmallows on the top of the cake…..the perfect breakfast.

Some gorgeous home made presents and cards, and some wonderful surprises from friends and family arrived in the mail. Having kids means you can’t be flat for your birthday, Sam made my favorite Carbonara for lunch and then I went to bed. Enough said…..so I am re celebrating in July hopefully in Paris and will work out a new time for the portraits with Carla Coulson.

Running on Empty

I’ve been off the radar for a bit, well two weeks anyway. After a hospital visit with a high temperature, exhaustion and unable to walk I had a chest ex-ray and two different women trying to do blood gas tests in the artery in my wrists. They tried three times and it was excruciating each time, eventually they told me I didn’t have pneumonia and I could go home. This was on the fourth of June.

On the nineteenth of June after continuing to feel exhausted, having problems with both my hands that resulted in a trip to the neurologist at the hospital (they tell me everything is fine with the nerves in my hands and the problem should just go away) the local Dr tells me that nothing is wrong with me, that I’ve been telling her I’m feeling tired for some time now, that my blood pressure is always low, and that I probably had a virus and the rest is just menopause as nothing shows in the blood tests. Hmmmmm Thanks!

So I’m none the wiser and she told me to give it three weeks and rest and see what happens.

Actually the entire conversation was between Sam and the Dr and I just tuned right out….in fact I almost walked out in despair. I feel I need to regroup, and take charge of my own health. They don’t keep records here when you visit the doctor, so I’m writing it all down from now on.

A lovely friend I spoke with on skype yesterday told me I looked like an empty vessel….to take time out and absorb some love and sunshine and just rest a bit. I don’t have any choice right now, even the shortest walk exhausts me, and I am certainly no energizer bunny right now.

Oh and to top it all off Sam and I both had conjunctivitis which is going around, (which is why my eyes are puffed up in the pics) and I have a head cold.

The good thing is that I am ever optimistic and know this will pass, and I’m learning some unexpected lessons along the way.

The White House (casa bianca)

Yesterday we had to sign the paperwork for the white house, it’s such a funny lengthy process which took place in Pinerolo about 40 minutes drive away. We dropped the kids off at friends, and spent over an hour at the Notaio going through the entire contract with nine people in total in the room.

One was an elderly lady that looked like she was about to faint from the heat. It turned out I didn’t actually need to be there, but having heard so much about the other times we’ve bought property in Italy I was totally bemused to see the process in action. So we now have access to the ‘White House’ and took a look inside after we got home.

Although it looks like a nightmare right now, Sam cleared out much of the rubbish and we are starting to see the rooms under the mess left behind. He loaded much of it onto the blue tractor with a pitchfork and a full load was only the tip of the iceberg. The building has three rooms in total, no bathroom at all and two cellars underneath that are full of rubbish.

As you enter the building and go up a flight of stairs a room on the right is now cleared, it is actually very light and airy. To the left you enter a kitchen area and from that room go up a very crooked staircase to the main bedroom.

This is the worst room and is black with mold, the balcony is dangerous and Sam blocked it off. Once emptied, cleaned and painted we will be able to get a feel for the potential. I’m staying clear of the process at the moment.

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Online Overwhelm

I’m hoping this post won’t seem disjointed, I’ve opened the computer many times in the last few days to write a post and just shut it again. The first week I was sick just opening my inbox had me in tears, it seemed like everyone was shouting, that all the conversations and groups and posts I love to read would suck me completely into a vortex. The more everyone reached out the further inwards I shrank. I felt like I was going mad, up down, crying, tired, over wrought, and emotionally wrung out.

All the excitement I felt within B-School fell in a heap, the momentum I had going dropped out from under me and I thought I’d never get back here to writing again. My constant refrain right now is Piano Piano….(slowly slowly) so if you sent me a message or email know that I read what I could but just couldn’t bring myself to answer, I just didn’t want to speak with anyone, it all seemed so exhausting. Know that I thank you all so much for all the well wishes and suggestions, the concern and love, it makes a difference even if I couldn’t tell you at the time.

The Simple Life

Funnily enough since feeling so tired I have really looked at our life here, the simplicity we wanted to create has slipped into each of us being on the computer more than out enjoying our simple lifestyle. Taking small walks each day to the top of the road and back reminds me of why we are here in the first place, it’s to engage with life, to breathe in the mountain air, to grow our food, to be with our kids, to be healthy and happy together, and to share this with others wanting a similar dream.

Maybe we are all too hard on ourselves, even here in the valley those bad habits followed us, as I get better and stronger I’ll be sharing more of our simple life as we find it for ourselves. After a year and a half here in Italy I am totally in love with my life, the valley and know this is the place we are meant to be, creating a simple life in Italy. When I think of us here over years to come I see this first year as a learning curve.

Each of us has our own stresses, health issues, family drama’s, dreams we are chasing, dysfunctional families, or what ever other things you’re dealing with daily…..I’m sharing with you so that you know you are not alone, and once shared love and compassion flow from a community so beautiful and connected, without everyone here life would be less full, less inspiring, and who would I talk with LOL……..

So rambling post over, now I am back on the bike so to speak I’m sure the next one will be easier and feel more natural.

I continue to take it slowly, hope if you are weary you can take the time to slow down and rest, regroup, and come back stronger than ever.

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and the gang x

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36 replies

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Margaret | Destination Here&Now says:
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I think there’s something in the air Lisa. I think BSchool was great on many levels but I think the intensity of its 8 weeks really requires some down time afterwards. It has for me anyway.Take care lovely xx
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- Lisa Chiodo says:
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  I keep thinking of all these contributing factors Margaret, I can’t even look at the b-school fb group right now, it’s been three weeks and I’m still not much better. Hoping to talk with a friend here in Italy whose husband is a Doctor and speaks english, maybe he can point me in the right direction xx
  Hope you enjoyed your down time, sorry not in touch just doing the minimum right now and computer tires me out. xxx
head in the sun says:
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Our bodies are sneaky little devils.
They have a great way of sitting us back down on our arses when our heads aren’t paying enough attention to our lives swirling around us.
Rest.
And float along for a while.
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- Lisa Chiodo says:
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  Oh love that ……yep sat down on my arse that’s for sure lol x
  floating sounds nice xx
Wynne says:
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I agree with others here re: getting to a doctor in the UK. The fact that written records aren’t kept in Italy is just scary.

But rest assured that this, too, shall pass and someday be just a memory. Lots of rest and healthy meals, my friend. And happy birthday again!
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- Lisa Chiodo says:
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  Sam said she does keep records but I never feel that she actually listens to what I am telling her. A total waste of time and i have no faith anymore. Trying something else and getting another opinion. Always healthy meals around here, thank goodness Sam does all the cooking xxx
DesireEmpire says:
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Go well and try to get a second opinion. Hoping you feel stronger soon.
Carolyn
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- Lisa Chiodo says:
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  thanks Carolyn, onto it and getting another opinion on Sunday hopefully xxx
Rose says:
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My gorgeous Lisa, you’d look beautiful even if you stepped put of a wind tunnel. Please, if you can, take your aunt’s advice, and fly out to the UK for a once over. Rest is paramount and lots of fluid is a must. I have had great relief with Zinc and turmeric capsules. Also, loads os sunshine to get that vitamin D level up, so important for women. Enough of that.
How wonderful the cake and presses. Please take good care. Love you and can’t wait to see the Paris photos. Always in my and our hearts. Rose.xxxxx
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- Lisa Chiodo says:
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  Gorgeous girl my Carina and I loved the birthday celebration even though it wasn’t what I had planned. Right now I don’t know when we will get to Paris, I feel no better and it’s been three weeks. Apparently nothing is wrong with me…..ruddy hell it’s so frustrating. It’s hard to get around the system and not being able to explain in English is making it harder. I’m looking on google but have no idea what is going on.
  
  sending love xxx
Val says:
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Made your poor old Aunt sad to know that you are feeling so unwell. I know in my heart that you will find the answer to the problem. My worry is that the longer it go’s on the weaker you will keep getting. Maybe if after your next trip there is no resolve, could you not think of a cheap flight to the UK and straight to see a hospital or doctor there. It is only a suggestion. Know that we are all thinking of you and wishing you well. On another thought. Do you wear masks when dealing with all the dust, mould etc. mould can cause all sorts of problems with our body’s

Anyway 50 is the new 40 and you can celebrate in Paris later. Lots of love to you all and a big hug especially for you from me.
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- Lisa Chiodo says:
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  50 is the new 40…..love that!!
  If things don’t get resolved I will start looking at other options. WE have a GP friend coming over so he might have an idea for me to follow. up. I haven’t been going into the other house and avoiding the mould like the plague. Just frustrating not getting any answers arghhh xxxx
Jackie Stenhouse says:
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Your family is wonderful making your day special. Have you looked up the symptoms of Chronic fatigue syndrome? I am pretty sure nothing would show up on the blood test if you were suffering from this. Must be a little frightening not being able to get a proper diagnosis when you know you are so ill. Hope things get better for you quickly and good luck with your new venture.
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- Lisa Chiodo says:
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  That is exactly it Jackie, I know I am not well, and still no diagnosis just fobbed off like I’m making it up. I had a wonderful Dr in Australia and I have been thinking of seeing if she would look at my results via email. sending love xx
lynda sharples says:
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Hi Lisa,
firstly I love that I can almost hear your voice and mind defying that body that is failing you at this moment in time. You are a courageous bold woman …being sick is the pits and could overtake your beautiful spirit, but you wont let it :)Paris will wait…. One day at a time and I’m sure you will look back and wonder how you did it !The white house looks exciting! I agree with Alison…I turned 50 wandering the muddy streets of a Fijian village and nobody knew (except family back in Australia) …it was liberating …my little secret. Being fifty to me meant I could be myself and not conform to all the rules ever ever again! Still brings a smile to say “I am over fifty and can think , wear and do what I want. As long as the consequences don’t involve bail or jail hahaha . Take care x Love to Sam Carina and Luca x Lynda ( Nanna Mac on Macleay Island)
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- Lisa Chiodo says:
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  Lynda sorry for the delay replying, and it’s nice to see myself through your eyes. Bold Defiant and courageous love this x
  I love being 50, although at the moment we have the 21 year old daughter of some friends staying with us and it makes me yearn for my 20’s again.
  love to you xxx
Alison says:
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good to hear you’re recovering. Maybe its time to shut the computer, take a pen or pencil and a lovely journal and sit under a tree – write if you want to…or don’t. I thought turning 50 was extremely overrated, so going to Paris to celebrate being well might just be what you need.
Continue to get well and looking forward to hearing more of your lovely stories.
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- Lisa Chiodo says:
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  ahhh sounds like heaven and I had visual diaries at college. Great idea. xxx
Anne says:
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Ah How cute of Carina to make the Eiffel tower out of Marshmallows. I am shocked to read that you are still not well at all ,, and how do the doctors know what happened to you in the past ,,,?? How strange. I am so happy though that despite not feeling well and missing your trip to Paris that you had a lovely day. Big hugs xx
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- Lisa Chiodo says:
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  She is gorgeous and can’t wait to get to Paris Anne. I am much better now and the virus lasted a month, still a little slow but much improved. xxx